description help

[Suhis]

How to write better descriptions v0.1
=====================================

This text is written to ease your task when trying to do good descriptions
and more important, to help you to create better descriptions.

The methods mentioned here are not rules or obligations. I am not the
God here so I cannot force you to follow them. I just hope that you
read this text and consider it.


Index
==============================================================================

1.0 ........ Room descriptions
1.1 .... Short descriptions
1.2 .... Long descriptions
1.3 .... Room emotes

2.0 ........ Monster descriptions
2.1 .... Short descriptions
2.2 .... Long descriptions
2.3 .... Monster emotes

3.0 ........ Equipment descriptions
3.1 .... Short descriptions
3.2 .... Long descriptions

4.0 ........ Miscellaneous

5.0 ........ Closing


1.0 -- ROOM DESCRIPTIONS
==============================================================================

The room descriptions are probably the most visible part of the MUD.
Because of that, they should be carefully prepared and written with lot
of time. The room descriptions (the short and the long descriptions)
should include 'a picture' of the current room/region where the player is.

Many times the area creators forgot that, or then they go to the opposite
and add elements that shouldn't be presented there. When doing a room
description, keep in mind, that the descriptions should tell what the
room looks like when the player looks around, but nothing else.

Also, remember to let the players to do their own conclusions. You don't
always need to say that the throne is the place where the king sits,
or that the food in the container in front of the cow, is placed there
for the cow to eat. Players should find out those things by themselves.


1.1 -- Short descriptions

Many people think that the short descriptions don't matter all
that much, but they forgot that most of the players don't have
verbose mode on, thus seeing only the short descriptions.

Short descriptions should be 15-70 characters wide (max width
being the standard 79 chars) and end to the line feed command
'\n'. They should describe the room and the current position
of the player with just a few words.

Ie.
'Deep in the dark forest.'
'Catacombs under the ancient city.'
'Deck of the pirate ship.'
'The northernmost corner of the cave.'




1.2 -- Long descriptions

Long descriptions are the actual visible side of the MUD. They
should be written with much time and effort, and be typo checked
several times. The long descriptions should describe what the
players can see when he uses the 'look' command.

The long descriptions should be justified to fit the max 79
characters wide lines and to end to the line feed mark '\n'.

As it name says, long descriptions are supposed to be long
descriptions of the room. So remember to give enough extensive
description. Describe the ground, the walls, the climate, the
vegetation, the illustration, special objects and such. Good
way is to imagine, or even draw a picture of the room to the
paper and then start to write the detailed description.
Always remember to describe the exits of the room and what the
player can see when he looks for example to the north. Does
the hallway continue there? Does the trees get more dense or
maybe there is an exit or such.

Read this carefully. The difference between quickly done,
usually poor areas and good areas with nice descs is the
changing of the room descriptions. Making of the descs is maybe
the most boring part of the area creation, and making different
descriptions for every room really takes time. But still,
yet no room should have same description with another. Naturally
when you are walking in a big forest, the rooms must look pretty
same, but adding small details like paths, flowers, rocks, etc.
helps to make them different. Don't just use cut'n'paste. When
you have done one long room description, keep a break, and when
doing the next description, don't try to remember the actual
words you used on the previous description, but use new words
and sentences. One of the wizards on Zombiemud called Fishbert
made over 50 totally different room long descriptions to his
forest area. It is possible, it's hard, but that's what
makes the difference.

IF YOU DON'T *KNOW* HOW TO MAKE DIFFERENT DESCRIPTIONS TO EVERY
SINGLE ROOM, YOU TOTALLY LACK THE NEEDED IMAGINATION TO BE A
AREA CREATOR.

(If you KNOW how to do them, but don't do, you are a lazy
bastard and maybe you should consider your wizardhood again
too)

Always assume that the player has entered that room through
relocate/summon (or has been incapable to see where he is going).
By doing this, you will abandon the incorrect comprasions to the
previous or the still coming rooms. Don't use sentecences like
the following in your descriptions.

'The air is warmer.'
'The floor is more dusty.'
'The rope continues in this room.'
'Like in the second floor, there is a large altar.'

'The hallway continues to the north.'

-- (This in case that the hallways continues to the south
too, don't assume that the player came from the south,
just because the area entrance is in that directory)

So, just always assume that the player is in this room for the
first time, and he haven't seen any other rooms in this area
before.

As said before, the long description should be what the player
can see when using the 'look' command. They shouldn't include
any hints, feelings or similiar. Don't use sentences like the
following in your descriptions.

'When you look around, you can remember all the stories
you have heard about this castle.'

'Now you have to decide will you go to the north to
confront the evil priest or to the east to face the
rotten zombie.'

'Be very careful while exploring this forest.'

'You are sure that the devil lord Naradaz is in the north.'

If you have to, use instead some indefinite sentences like,

'You can feel great evil emitting from the west.'

'Great horror fills you when you look at the altar.'

'You feel like some carefulness would be in place now.'

Notice that sentences like that work better on the room items
and such, not in the long description itself.

Do not add monsters/items to your long descriptions. Nothing is more
disgusting than a room description with 'There are two guards here.'
and then there is also two guards cloned to that room as a monsters.
This would be all right if area creators would add a routine
that would change the long description after each of the guards
are killed, but for some reason, they don't. So do not mention
any monsters/equipiment/items/etc on the long description that
are cloned and moved to that room.

Do not mention actions or movement on the long descriptions, except
if the movement is associated with some of the room elements like
the wall or vegetation. For example, the following sentences would
be ok (but still, rather do them as room emotes)

'The small trees swing in the wind.'
'The waves collide gently with the shore.'

But the following sentences should be made as a room emotes.

'The bear snarls and tries to eat your leg!'
'The bushes move a bit like someone would be running there.'
'The earth trembles as the volcano erupts.'

Good long descriptions allways include a lot of items. Actually
good rooms have more text in the items than in the long description
itself. The following example is from one of my areas, it isn't
any ideal description, actually it isn't very long or detailed,
but just a example of the room items (the items that are
described with the set_items() function are capsed and marked
with **)

---
The *GROUND* here is very moist and coated with fine *GRAVEL*. The *VEGETATION*
consist of a few *FERNS* and one small *TREE*. The air is very hot and humid.
There are *RUINS* all over this region. The *RUINS* continue to the east
and south.
---

Ok, now let's look at the items. Notice that every subject in that long
desc is listed as a item, and has it's own description. Also the item
descriptions have references to more items, they are capsed and marked
with **.

---
ground -- The ground is really moist and coated with fine *GRAVEL*.
vegetation -- The vegetation is mostly ferns. There is a one small *TREE*
in the middle this region.
ferns -- The ferns are huge and vital looking.
tree -- The tree is small and it is covered with *LIANES*.
lianes -- The green lianes cover the only *TREE* in this region.
gravel -- The fine grey *GRAVEL* coats ground.
ruins -- The ruins look like they once were thick *WALLS* of a *TOWER*
of some kind.
walls -- The ruins look like they once were thick *WALLS* of a *TOWER*
of some kind.
tower -- The ruins look like they once were thick *WALLS* of a *TOWER*
of some kind.
---

The items give the flesh to the skeleton that the long description
is. They make the areas deeper and help when creating quests and
such. Always remember to add the items, and use some effort when
doing them. Also remember, that you shouldn't either use cut'n'paste
on the items, not every tree or rock is similiar. Use your
imagination.

One thing that most of the area creators tend to forget is the
set_weather() and set_light() functions. I think that this
is mostly because of the lack of knowledge about those functions
than because of the ignorance towards them.

set_light(int lightamount)

Function is used when setting the amount of the light
in the room. 0 means darkness, and positive numbers
the amount of the light. If you use for example,
set_light(-100), not even 50 lit torches are enough
to let the players be able to see. So be careful
with this function and don't use extreme amounts.

set_weather(int lightlevel, int weather, int climate)

Function is used when selecting the weather and
climate. Check them from the following table,

lightlevel

0 no day/night changes == indoors without
windows
1 day/night changes == outdoors where the
sun/moon rotates normally

weather

1 no weather
2 indoors
3 shelter
4 full feather

climate

0 normal
1 bad
2 tropic
3 jungle
4 desert
5 artic
6 sea

I am not 100% sure about those values, and if someone
can confirm them for me or tell if there is any errors,
I would priciate it.



1.3 -- Room emotes

The room emotes are a big part of the areas. As far as I know,
there is no actual room emotes written in the actual MUD lib,
so you have to code them by yourself or to ask someone to give you
code for them.

Room entering messages can also be considered as room emotes,
I don't have much to say about them, just remember to keep them
enough inaccurate and not too spamming, and if that entering
message is ment to be for example area entering message, make
sure that it won't be shown when the player enters the room from
the other directions than the area entrance.

Room emotes should describe movement, sounds, smells and such.
Good room emotes could be something like,

'You can smell weird odour coming through the ceiling.'
'A mouse runs through the floor.'
'You can hear wolf howling for the moon.'
'Fear fulfills you as you look at the flaming fire.'

Do not mess room emotes with long descriptions. Keep them clearly
seperated and that will give your rooms certain classy feeling.



2.0 -- MONSTER DESCRIPTIONS
==============================================================================

The monsters are a big part of the MUD. Many times the monsters are just
slaughtered without reading the descriptions, but still descriptions help
to catch the right mood, and some times they are big part of the quests and
such.


2.1 -- Short descriptions

When talking about monsters, the short descriptions are the more
visible part and you should write them carefully.

The short descriptions should be 5-30 characters long and they
are not supposed to end to the line feed mark '\n'.

First of all. Short description should state the name, race,
appereance or so. It shouldn't tell what the monster is doing,
monster emotes are for that. Some examples about bad short
descriptions for monsters.

'Squirrel jumping all over the trees'
'A peasant digging a well'

Also, it is ridiculous to have some action on the short/long
description, specially when you for example start fighting
with the monster. You think that 'The king sleeping in his bed'
is still sleeping while you smash his head and he starts to
hit back?

When not doing invidual monsters, remember that it is
grammatically correct to add 'A/An' in front of the short description.
Ie. 'A peasant dressed in grey rags'

Some examples of the good short descriptions,

'Gandalf the wizard'
'A brown squirrel'
'Silvano the emperor of the world'
'Enigma, the poor peasant wearing brown boxers'
'A guard wielding a large polearm'



2.2 -- Long descriptions

The long descriptions of the monsters are often forgotten, but
that doesn't mean that the area creator could forget them.
Atleast YOU know that the descriptions are straigth from the
arse, and it is your pride that is in question, even that
it wouldn't bring you any more levels. Also, as previously
mentioned, there is a use for the long descriptions, don't
do that mistake to think like there wouldn't be.

The long descriptions should be justified to fit the max 79
characters wide lines and to end to the line feed mark '\n'.

The long descriptions of the monsters should tell what the
monster looks like as a whole. It's body structure, face,
eyes, mouth, ears, clothing, special marks and everything
else. The long description should NOT tell anything about
what the monster is currently doing as previously explained
in the chapter 2.1. Also, if the monster for example has a
brown tunic, do it as a armour and let the monster wear that
tunic, don't put it to the long description.

You don't need to force the descriptions to be long and too
detailed, just list all the main details and such.

ie. 'Assis the nyissan merchant'

The nyissan merchant has a slim and tanned body. He has a narrow face
and enlarged yellow pupils. His head is shaven and he has long
slender fingers.

He is wearing:
Legs: Green loincloth
Feet: Brown leather boots



2.3 -- Monster emotes

The monster emotes should describe what the monster does or says.
These things should not be described in the short or the long
descriptions.

The monster emotes should be justified to fit the max 79
characters wide lines and to end to the line feed mark '\n'.

Try to keep up on standard on the emotes. Not like,

'Man Says: You want the key?'
'Man says "I won't give you the key"'

The say emotes should be done using the following 'formula'

Man says 'I love you.'

That is the most usual, traditional AND best looking way to
do it.

Also remember that you should give the monster different emotes
while it is fighting. I don't believe that the monsters will
continue what they were doing before you attack them while
they are fighting against you.

Examples of some good monster emotes,

'The cat purrs.'
'The snake hisses.'
'Silvano states 'All the mortals shall be punished.''
'The guard makes some nasty glances at you.'
'The peasant digs the ground.'
'The dog sleeps.'
'Yaga sharpens his dagger and whistles innocently.'



3.0 -- EQUIPMENT DESCRIPTIONS
==============================================================================

Equipment is important to the players, so it is logical that they will
be watching and handling them for time to time. The players usually
just care about the stats of the equipment, but still, they will
rather look at the good descriptions than at the poor ones.


3.1 -- Short descriptions

The short descriptions are the most important part of the
descriptions of the equipment. So be carefull with them.

The short descriptions of the equipment should be max. 5-60
characters long, but not longer than 79 characters. They are
not supposed to end with the line feed mark '\n'.

The short description should include a brief description of the
eq, they can hold information about movement or actions,
usually these things should be mentioned inside the () or <>,
ie. 'Steel sword (shining)', 'Black obsidian ring <vibrating>'.

Also remember that if you have for an example a horned beast,
don't let it wear equipment called something like 'The horn
of the horned beast', but clone and move that horn to the room
when the beast is killed.

The short description can include information about the
material, size and appearance of the equipment. It is hard to
make bad short descriptions for the equipment, but believe me,
it is possible.

NOTICE: As far as I know, the current mudlib doesn't include support
for correct equipment short name parsering, so at the moment,
don't add 'A/An' in front of the short descriptions, ie.
'A ring'.

Some examples of good short descriptions,

'Golden crown with diamonds implanted'
'Sharp iron dagger'
'Boots made out of brown and rigid leather'



3.2 -- Long descriptions

Like the monster long descriptions, the equipment long descriptions
are often despised. Still you shouldn't disparage them. They are
big part of the eq, and like all the other descriptions, you
should do them with care.

The long descriptions should be justified to fit the max 79
characters wide lines and to end to the line feed mark '\n'.

The long descriptions of equipment should include a description
of what the equipment looks like when the player uses the
'look at' command. It shouldn't include any kind of history for
the equipment, like 'Three generations of dwarves forged this
plate.' The player has no way to know that by just glancing at
the equipment, add text or something to the equipment if you want
the player to know something like that. Also the player shouldn't
be informed about how the eq is/was supposed to use with, so
no anything like 'Peasant used this fork to pile up shit.',
of course if the eq is part of a quest, you can give them hints
like 'Maybe you should pile shit with it?', but nothing else.

Writing the descriptions is not too hard, just imagine the
equipment and describe all the materials and forms the
equipment has.

Using set_items() in the equipment is not forbidden, rather
engouraged, but do not overdo it because those items may interfere
with other commands/room items.



4.0 -- MISCELLANEOUS
==============================================================================

So, now a short summary about some of those things.

Put time and effort to the descriptions. Don't use cut'n'paste.
Use different descriptions on different rooms/monsters/etc.

Always assume that the players looks at this descriptions for the
first time. He doesn't know anything about it's history, or
rooms/items/monster related to it.

Do actions/movement/and other similiar things through emotes,
not through descriptions.

Remember to use the max 79 character rule and to add the line
feed marks ('\n') when necessary.

Do not give any hints to the players through describtions. Do them
through emotes, and remember to be enough inaccurate, the player
has no way to know about history/tales conserning some
place/equipment/monster/anything.

Short descriptions are supposed to be short. Long descriptions
are supposed to be long. This often seems to be hard to
remember.

Remember to add items via set_items() to your codings.

ALWAYS TYPO CHECK YOUR AREAS SEVERAL TIMES, ASK SOMEONE ELSE
WITH GOOD KNOWLEDGE OF ENGLISH GRAMMAR TO TYPO CHECK THEM FOR
YOU BEFORE TRYING TO GET YOUR AREA APPROVED!



5.0 -- CLOSING
==============================================================================

This is not supposed to be any general rule about how to write
descriptions. Just something I wrote, and I wrote it without standing
up during the whole process, so it is done pretty fast. I am sure it
contains typos, errors, inaccuraties and such. I will take any comments
conserning this text, and then work up with a new version. Until then,
I hope this helps you to write better descriptions, or atleast gave
you something to think about.



- Breath